Still Searching?

Every single day that passed by, I hoped for happiness to come along. Every day I wished that my problems and my family’s would be all gone. And, we would be happy. Really happy. However, as times passed, nothing happened the way I hoped and still hope for.

Problems came, old and new. Some of them broke the hearts of every member of my family–including me. Other problems brought us together. But, there were always something that led me to think that happiness is not part of our life. Every moment is ruined by the intrusion of others or ourselves.

I’ve been trying to understand the reason for such misadventure.  Are we cursed? Do we always need to overcome issues to live modestly happy? Are we the results of others’ intentions? I haven’t come up with an answer. I think that I won’t ever find an answer. In the past, I would’ve given all my energy to avoid thinking of those questions, but my avoidance became my doom.

There is so much in this world that cannot be quantified in a blog, or two. Happiness is one of them. Now that I have something else to worry about, I realize that happiness is where the people you love are. It gives me joy, knowing that my family cares about me as much as I care about them. Those are the people who are always with you, no matter what. But, it aches me that I’m also trying to help them, but they won’t listen.

Although, it is obvious that they want to help me first since they believe, in their hearts, that they have to. So, is there happiness? Yes, there is. The matter is how well our eyes are to really look closely.

My happiness has come with a price. A price I must certainly pay. But, if I can have the only thing that nobody can take away, I will be the happiest man alive. I have a family. With all the needs and problems, but a family.

We sometimes underestimate the power and meaning of family. Brothers and sisters. Fathers and mothers. Daughters, sons and parents. We all want something from each other. But we won’t get it till we really look closely. Family is not just a word. There are people in it that would give up everything for the sake of a member. I’m living it. Every day. I’m just waiting to get well to return what I have been given: a second chance, with a twist.

I hope everybody could have what I have. Not the curse, obviously. But, my family. We need to go past the greed, the pain, the need, the sadness, the wishing, the negativity and so on. I’m working on my family to let them know that we don’t need what others have. And we don’t have what others need. We are just humans, still searching.


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